[angry enter]
i was GOING to do an hilarious post about how when you look up "becky" on urban dictionary it has a bunch of really flattering entries about how beckys are sexy and hot and well! everything that i am! sexy! hot! awesome! (disclaimer: these were not, in fact, written by me. they are, in fact, scientific FACT! backed up by EXPERIMENTS! AND OTHER THINGS!)
how do you do an experiment to test the becky? I DON'T KNOW! i'm not a doctor, dammit! however, the entries were beautifully written and completely spelled correctly and verifiably true. true to the very core. to the very CORE of the matter. which is. becky=hot.
[resuming angry enter]
NOW? [angry pause. followed by eye roll. concluded with heavy angry, affronted sigh.] they are all about blowjays! BLOWJAYS???? yes, apPARENTLY! this charlatan has tried to redefine the word becky to mean a really great blowjay. ok. well. yes... some people** can attest to the fact that i give a really steamy blowjay. they might even tell you that i am a master at jay blowing. i'm not going to argue that fact. i will concede that i, becky, am very good at doing things to things.
however, i do NOT appreciate my NAME being used as a descriptor of beeg. that's just bleck. not nice at all, urban dictionary submitters and also that rapper guy who's doing all the besmirching! NOT nice! and also! uncalled for! and furthermore! just poopy!
i just may start an angry petition. OR a facebook "we don't like this so you should join us and not like it either because jesus would want you to and also santa!" page where we bash blowjays and uplift and comfort beckys. wanna join?
the CORRECT urban dictionary entry...
click to embiggenps can i just say something about the fact that my "brother" made us all sign up*** for "twitter?" well, he did and NOW my sister sends twits like this: "rock climbing this morning for an hour and a half at [gym name not given due to the fact that you could go there and punch my sister in her pretentious face]! arms are sore but it was awesome!" what. a. whore. she ALSO told my mom what i was doing (using twitter as her evil guide) and then TEXTED ME ON HER BEHALF! ON HER BEHALF! i was HIDING from my mother! jesus!
*smeeerch
**chuck
***um, yeeeaaah... about that. i have a "the real becky" twitter account for my non-secret beckyness.
more urban dictionary, you say? well i say: veg has some! i also think she kind of implied that i was lazy. what. ever.
24 comments:
Twitter is how satan keeps track of us all.
First, I have a confession to make. I went to Urban Dictionary just now and looked up my own name. And guess what? I'm going to post my two fave entries for you to read. (I'm cool like that.)
"Small, short catlike person. Very easy to tease, but there's no reason to tease an Angela because they're very sweet. You can trust an Angela. Often, Angelas need a hug. Give your Angela a hug today."
(I'm not very catlike, but I'm always in need of a hug.)
"A desired human being who often pwns noobs at various video games including Dance Dance Revolution. Angela's also generally posses a large rear end. This rear end can be referred to as Laquisha."
LAQUISHA! I'm dying with laughter over here. I'm going to start referring to my rear end as Laquisha from now on. Heck yes!
And as for Twitter...It's bad enough that my parents both have facebook, I would die if they got Twitter too.
What would I do without your coolness Becky queen of the blowjay.
Check out what The Urban Dictionary says about me. I guess you should just worship me.
Omg I heard that song once on XM radio and I was like wtf is he talking about. Now I know! Thanks for enlightening my gangster side.
Now, of course, I have to go look up my own name.
Relax...better to be named after a good beej than...something worse.
oh my jesus, you crack me up. also? besmirch and charlatan are EXCELLENT vocab choices, way to ue your words becky!
i am very confused by the definition of names in urban dictionary. my name has 22 definitions including:
"the most stuning face ever. he face is so nice it can make a manbear pig puke up its own cow. althow her face may be nice he butt is so hairy it has watermelons growing iside it.
someone who puts tissue or other objects down her top
someone who puts tissue or other objects down her top
An extremely cool girl who everyone wants to f*ck. she is really hot and really nice. she is extremely good in bed"
Help I'm having an urban identity crisis!
I was right. I could be worse. You could have my name and my a cum guzzler:
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Alyson
repl- that satan, he's so sneaky.
ang- it's so descriptive. and i gave thumbs up to the good becky ones. couldn't give more than one thumbs down to the beeg ones.
veggie- you would be lost and alone. i already do.
court- i try to keep up with the gangstas. i've been know to keep it gangsta. are the kids still keeping it gangsta?
owo- should i count my lucky stars?
lusty- why thank you for noticing my unrivaled vocab usage! unrivaled i say! and also rivaled, sometimes. what was i saying? oh, right. i'm going to need to borrow a tissue.
owo- that? is hotness. hotty hotness. not to be confused with haughty hotness.
I found that new Becky song a couple days ago too. It's not even a GOOD song, it's so disappointing. I mean, Baby Got Back was pretty damn groundbreaking for the Beckys of the world, even though it kinda makes fun of us for being whitey white girls. But this one's just lame. Bah.
I think this means you're a celebrity now. When is the sex video?
Ya know, there are a lot of sex songs with Nikki in it. Not cool.
Be proud your name describes your talents, it looks good on resumes!
Hi :)
Thanks for a fun post!
You are the best Becky ever!
:)
Love & Best Wishes,
@RKCharron
xoxo
Ooooh I hope I don't have my name in that web, it's pretty specific and I don't think there will be though but if there is,I'll crush them. Ha.
Your fam is hilarious. I think this is why I'll keep my twitter private.
From Alabama- I love your blog... thanks for the sweet comment. :)
But Beckys do go good with blow jays! So does Applesauce, newsreporting, napping, jello shots... actually pretty much everything goes with blow jays.
Oh my LORD, you are funny! I love your writing style as well as your tags at the bottom of this post!
I'll be ba-aaaack...
becky! i am totally inspired to write an urban disctionary blog post now. ha-larious. you freaking crack me up.
"embiggen" is quite possibly the best new word EV.ER.
At least it's not about Beckys giving teeeerrrrrrrible head! No? Yeah, I know. I'm "Run Around Sue" for Christ sake:( So lame.
Oh. My. Gosh. You are hilarious. This post totally made me crack up!! Love your blog. :]
*sidenote: Thanks for the comment on my blog. Hehehe I'm so worried I'm gonna get a speeding ticket now. I think it may be too late to knock on wood too!
You're a very funny writer. The urban dictionary is pure entertainment. I remember once I heard this song by Nelly and Diddy, something that said 'drop down and get your eagle on'. I looked up the phrase in the U. Dictionary online and it essentially was a reference to giving someone head. It's like, Who makes this crap up!!!
ahaha, now i have to check what my name means:) great post as always, you always make me laugh:)
This was HILARIOUS. You had me laughin' hysterically, gurrrrl.
What does a girl have to do to make her name mean something "sexy" or "sexual"? In the future,will someone use the word "demi" to mean hawt and gorgeous?
(checking urban dictionary)
Oh, what do you know?
Demigoddess means: A mortal woman that can please you like a goddess.
I'm happy with that.
Talk about following the pack:
Brandy...
"A Girl Who's Crazy, Yet loving, caring, and will fuck you up if you touched her.Does love sex, porn, but is very smart, always pretty, and witty, ussualy a bitch, but is the best kind of girl. Ussualy is a dick magnent."
I can't say I like that much...
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