this is not about schmerk. please restrain yourself. for the children

what follows is a vague rant about my current life where i vaguely reference "assholes." listen, you know who you are, assholes. you know who you are and what you've done. you know who you've betrayed and shat on for no apparent reason other than the fact you seem to have no connection in your brain between real people and the fucked up shit you think you'll get away with at this moment. "You unlock this door with the key of imagination. Beyond it is another dimension. A dimension of sound. A dimension of sight. A dimension of mind. You're moving into a land of both shadow and substance of things and ideas. You've just crossed over into... The Twilight Zone."

well, i hate to tell you, but there are fucking shitty assholes in this world. fucking fuckers who are assy assholes who should probably be shut away in some sort of building together with other shitheads and not be allowed to talk to beckys. because guess what, assholes! beckys have feelings too! goddammit, motherfuckers!

guess what? i don't even care that you "have children." i don't even give a FUCK. you and your children can suck it. ok, fine. your children can just go sit in a corner and try to block from their mind that their mother FAILS at life. at life and living and being a human being. they can weep at the fact that they may be getting lung cancer from second hand motherfuckery. because? you're killing them, asshole. with your assholeness. your poisonous, silent sucking the life out of life.

you know what? you should probably just give them to me. you might not have screwed up the little one beyond repair. the most telling thing about the situation was that one time when i said, "i don't even know you." and it wasn't in a funny, almost laughing voice it was in my real, almost cry-y voice because, i'm cut to the QUICK!

however, just as i was really gearing up into a magnificent lather, i remembered i had pictures of dogs chasing ballz and fruuhzzy aminals at the zue (new spelling, try it out). that's right, you motherfucker, you can't get ME down. i have a DOG! she's always happy to see me and she almost never does shitty fucked up shit to me. one time she chewed up my underwear. ok, well several times. whatev. i've made my peace with crotchless underwear. it's stylish. ish. ok, fine... raggedy underwear with raggedy dog chewed holes in it isn't *exactly* stylish but it beats going commando, right? but really, let's get real: i mostly throw them away. that's it, next month it's the shitty petsmert foods.

THAT'S STILL BETTER THAN BEING A COLOSSAL ASSHOLEY MOTHERFUCKER! AND DON'T EVEN TRY TO DENY IT!

i feel better, you? *inhaaaaaaaale, exhale* *gotoyourhappyplace,gotoyourhappyplace*

candi doggie, can you see the complete adoration in her eyes? this is why i keep her around. adoration and she thinks i'm god. both good qualities.

pants, tha monstah. this is her "throw the fucking ball" face. scary, no?

tonka and pants being good because i said, "i will kill you if you don't shut it and let me take a picture. mommy loves you!"

see? you don't even remember what you were all angry about, do you? you're so silly when you're all angry and mad and you yell at ... that .... fucking fucker who fucked everyone over. WHAT A MOTHERFUCKER!!!!... *stab, stab, stabbbbbbbb*

*ahem* fruhzy zue aminals. they're hugging because they're trying to kill the patrons with their cutiepieness. bastards.