who am i still angry with? hmmmmm, i guess when i said i don't like to waste my time harboring anger towards others who are assholes i meant it but i also do still get angry when i think about some of them. does that mean i have to let my justified anger go? give it up? let it out? can i just make a list of people i'm still mad at?
i'm going to do my whole last clinic. yeah, that's right. the old job. the place where i practically grew up and was then thrown from unceremoniously. assholes. i've been thinking a lot about "who to invite to the wedding" lately. we're definitely keeping it super small but that does include some friends.
i would like to invite my old boss because even though he might have been complacent in my being let go, i know he didn't want it. which lead me into thinking about who else i would like to attend from the old job. then i remembered they all unfriended me on facebook and probably wouldn't even want to come. even though i worked there for six fucking years. they've chosen their side. they chose who to believe. they chose to assume i was shitting on them instead of a very unfair manager. they chose the girl who was stealing from them because she was a manipulative sociopath. that's their right. although it has made me angry, it now mostly makes me sad. sad to have lost the closeness and friendship.
yeah. so. there's a lot more to this whole story that i will not go into because jesus christ that would be a cluster fuck of emotions and explaining and more explaining and you being like, "what?" and me being like, "you shut up and just nod."
therefore, i am making a sweeping motion with my hands and say, "it's forgotten" a la barbara streisand as dolly in hello dolly! (why haven't you seen that movie?) i'm letting it go. i'm letting the feelings of failure on my part. on being unable to let go sooner of my feelings of betrayal. of being stabbed in the back and having the rug pulled out from under me. let. go.
i'm going to do my whole last clinic. yeah, that's right. the old job. the place where i practically grew up and was then thrown from unceremoniously. assholes. i've been thinking a lot about "who to invite to the wedding" lately. we're definitely keeping it super small but that does include some friends.
i would like to invite my old boss because even though he might have been complacent in my being let go, i know he didn't want it. which lead me into thinking about who else i would like to attend from the old job. then i remembered they all unfriended me on facebook and probably wouldn't even want to come. even though i worked there for six fucking years. they've chosen their side. they chose who to believe. they chose to assume i was shitting on them instead of a very unfair manager. they chose the girl who was stealing from them because she was a manipulative sociopath. that's their right. although it has made me angry, it now mostly makes me sad. sad to have lost the closeness and friendship.
yeah. so. there's a lot more to this whole story that i will not go into because jesus christ that would be a cluster fuck of emotions and explaining and more explaining and you being like, "what?" and me being like, "you shut up and just nod."
therefore, i am making a sweeping motion with my hands and say, "it's forgotten" a la barbara streisand as dolly in hello dolly! (why haven't you seen that movie?) i'm letting it go. i'm letting the feelings of failure on my part. on being unable to let go sooner of my feelings of betrayal. of being stabbed in the back and having the rug pulled out from under me. let. go.
10 comments:
I had a very similar experience at a job where my boss didn't stand up for me when I thought we were friends.
People kind of suck sometimes.
Oooohhh yeah- I feel you on this one. Those old co-workers are so iffy. Never have your back when you need it most. Kudos on yet another great post!!
They unfriended you on Facebook?! Whores.
I haven't seen Hello Dolly but I'll put it on my Netflix right now....
i was unceremoniously let go once. After 7 years of perfect attendance. do you know how hard that is? Very. They just eliminated my job like it was nothing.
Know whats even better? i got a better job at a bigger company making twice what i made there, and im the boss.
i sure showed them!
i bet i harbor a lot of hate. props to you for letting things go!
only if we walk elegant.
heart you.
hate the assholes at your old job for you. that's what friends are for.
I hope your current job treat you sooo much better!
sara- yucky. what is wrong with people, anyway?
paige- i guess i just thought they were actually friends. i'm so silly.
nikki- i know, who does that?
clo- dude. you are gonna LOVE it! oh, childhood memories! dancing in the living room.
fizzy- yeah, they were all like, "give me your key." when, hey guess what? they let the stealer keep her keys. good for you, though!
andy- ...you can never, ever carry it off! thank you! ♥
Best title for a post. EVER.
I know forgiveness is super important,
BUT
not always the easiest thing to do.
I have someone who I probably will never forgive and even can use the hate word when I talk about them.
That is not good
New here btw. : )
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