A Quick Progress Report

My boss has asked me today if I could “take a break from blogging for a bit to train the new girl.”

Pfft. The demands of this job are getting to be a bit ridiculous. But since he did just buy me a brand new video camera, I have agreed to try.

That being said, the new young little thing isn’t here yet so I’ve got a quick moment to give you a progress report.

Yes, my friends, it seems that I am making progress with The Master Plan.

This weekend, while at an itty bitty bar for a friend’s birthday party, there was a bit of a “scuffle”. Said scuffle involved friend’s husband and some other idiot (a label that I’m assuming will keep me off any future witness lists) and, eventually, our Chief of Police.

I don’t know the details of the fight – and really, those details aren’t important. What is important is that in the aftermath my friend found herself in a discussion with the COP (Chief of police…or, um, I guess cop would work too). And somewhere, somehow, at some point in the conversation, this phrase was said…

“Well, what would Britt do?”

Yeah. That’s right. Our COP felt the best counsel he could offer a citizen in trouble was “what would Britt do?”

Let’s just ignore the blasphemous implications here, and focus on the fact that I am starting to make headway in my plan to become the supreme authority on just about everything. I have been telling people for YEARS that if they would just listen to me, and of course do what I say, they would be so much better off. And finally, the general public is starting to come around.

I’m trying not to let this little bit of success go to my head. I must remember that I still have so far too go.

In fact, the party I’m hosting this evening in honor of my new title as Supreme Authority On Anything and Everything (That Happens in BFE Iowa) is going to be extremely understated and tasteful. Humility is so important.

Anyway, back to what this has to do with you…

Dear citizens of the blogosphere, as you struggle through your trials and tribulations today… as you cope with your boss and deal with the daily hardships… when you feel lost and confused and beaten and down-trodden… simply ask yourselves:

“What would Britt do?”

I think I’m going to need to make shirts.

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About the Author: Becky