grizzly bear, unicorn, rainbow

as you might be able to tell by now, i’ve gone completely and utterly insane. also, i got some new shiny cardboard. we bought sheets. if that doesn’t make sense, i’ll let you know that when you buy sheets they put shiny cardboard in there to keep the bed bugs from biting. or something. no, i’m pretty sure that’s it. you don’t need to google or wikipedia that at all because I DID ALL THE RESEARCH FOR YOU! now that’s full service, if you know what i mean and i mean, blow jays. also, look! new buttons down there! push them or something! (now *that’s* full service!) (reoawr)

anywho, i maded you a new header. i made it up real good. it’s a nature scene i came upon in nature. a beautiful unicorn, called stu, who just killed a ferocious grizzly bear (barry). now, for our younger readers, we could say barry’s sleeping but that would be a lie because he’s actually dead, which is a long sleep that you never wake-up from and worms eat your eyeballs out and that’s where your grandmother is too!

so stu killed barry and now he’s going to frolic around the body under the rainbow while being careful not to step in the corn filled poop that’s under there. you’ll also note, that at the end of the rainbow, there’s only me. because i’m so awesome. also, i stole all the gold and made best friendsies with the leprechaun. yay! happy ending! except for barry. because barry’s dead. (with your grandmother) (it’s ok, i can say that, because my grandmother’s dead too!) (but she wasn’t killed by a unicorn) (wouldn’t that’ve been cool though?) (i mean, if i had another grandmother….) (no, that thought was too far) (but in all fairness, the living grandmother i have is a HUGE asshole) (you ‘member that time i made a joke about dead puppies and everyone hated me? good times) (that might be happening again, eh?) (never learn you lesson do ya, eh?) (eeeeeh?)

ps thank you to that punk keepingyouawake for his help. what a punk.

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