Mother’s Day is coming up, or so I hear.

I have never had a proper Mother’s Day, since typically T has to work so I’m usually at home watching the boys.

But this year? This year T is off and I know exactly how I want my Mother’s Day to go. I only have a short list of things I want, so it should be easy enough for them to accomplish.

My list of 3 things that would make my Mother’s Day perfect:

1. For the love of God, let me pee in peace!

I just want one day, one time even, to go into the restroom to pee without being interrupted. The other day, my three year old brought me the jug of apple juice and a cup and asked me, mid-pee, to pour him some juice.

I know right, what the hell?!

I never pee without C trying to climb in my lap or give me a hug. And God forbid the dog not get in on some of that action. I just want ONE time. Just ONE TIME to pee in peace!

2. Id like to read my Kindle, without the battery being dead.

I don’t mind letting B play on my Kindle every now and then.

But the boy has this tendency to get it while I’m sleeping, run the battery dead as all get out, and then hand it back to me before nap time. Nap time being the only time I really have during the day to sit and read.

On Mother’s Day, I’d love to be able to read my Kindle without having it uncomfortably attached to the 12 inch charger.

3. My food/drink remains my food/drink.

I’m sure all mother’s relate to this. I make the boys a delicious sandwich, some carrot sticks, applesauce, and strawberries. Looks absolutely divine.

They refuse it. “I’m not hungry” they shout at me.

Three minutes later as I’m eating my string cheese, they decide the need it, want it, are-so-hungry-they-are-wasting-away.

Or Lord forbid I have a glass of anything. They need it, and they need all of it.

This Mother’s Day? I want something other than string cheese, and I want to eat it alone. A nice piece of chocolate cake would suffice.

I would devour that baby like it’s going out of style.

Its not like I’m asking for a lot. Its easy to give me my perfect Mother’s Day. No jewelry, no chocolate (besides my cake), and no fancy kitchen-ware. Just these three things. T and the boys should be able to handle it just fine.

Right? RIGHT?!

Tell me, what things are you hoping for this Mother’s Day? What would make your Mother’s Day perfect?