I got new running shoes the other day (these, if you are wondering), which is probably the most boring way possible to start off a blog post. You’re welcome!

I was looking around the running store after I chose my pair and realized how utterly baffling it is that we spend so much money to excel at a thing we are biologically designed to do. We are, at our core, all just bags of meat trying to survive and not get eaten by other bags of meat, and yet we have developed our species and society to a point where we can justify spending $250 on pants that make us run better and $30 on wraps that help get rid of shin splints. I am shocked conservatives are not staunchly against running because we have swayed so far off the traditional running path. We are destroying the sanctity of running!

I may not be trying to outrun a cheetah, but it is still amazing to see and feel my own progress. Of course I feel general discouragement because I have been running semi-regularly-ish for months and still don’t have the ability to run a marathon and THIS IS AMERICA, WHERE IS MY INSTANT GRATIFICATION, but going from someone who could barely run on the treadmill for a full minute to someone who can run at a steady pace for 10 minutes and push out a mile in 13 minutes is pretty fucking cool.

Of course the days where I am in love with running and everything about it are carefully balanced within the days where running feels like a heartbroken bitch lover clinging to my thighs, but I have been told that running is as mentally manic as it is physically painful, so I’ll take whatever I can get.

So there is my progress report. I wish I had more to say. Maybe next month.

Now if only I could make it up the 3 flights of stairs from the locker room to the gym without feeling like I’m going to vomit a baby, we’d be in business.

Has your body impressed you lately?