I am going to admit a fault of mine. Ready?
I have a hard time putting my computer and cell phone down while the boys are up.
So I promised myself that today, I would put it all away. I had planned on getting up and spending the entire morning engrossed in their world.
So I woke up before they did, and made tye-dye pancakes, a favorite of theirs.
I anxiously awaited the sleepy feet padding into the living room, while drinking my cup of coffee and reading on my Kindle.
The boys typically are up at different times every morning. B is usually first up at around 730. I typically have to wake C up by 830, because the kid is basically a college student trapped in a toddler body.
By this time it was 815. Pancakes were cold, and I was irritated. I kept thinking about how I could have slept in. How it would have been nice to still be in my PJ’s and curled in my nice warm bed.
By 8:30, I had enough. I was going in there to wake them up and we were going to enjoy our day together.
Except I didn’t expect to see what I did, when I walked in their shared bedroom. B curled up in C’s crib asleep next to his brother, and they were holding hands. Instantly, my heart melted and my mood changed.
You see, I cant keep putting their childhood into this “what I think it should be” realm. I was really angry that they had not followed their usual pattern and gotten up at the usual times. That things had not gone according to my plan. But walking into that bedroom I was reminded that childhood is fleeting.
There will be a time, I’m sure, that my boys wont want to share a room, much less a bed. There will be times when all Ill have is my computer and my phone, because my boy’s will be older and choose their friends over Mama time.
I need to step back. To let them grow into who they are going to be. To stop trying to micro-manage them. To let them enjoy their childhood, because it is going so very fast.
I ended up laying in B’s bed and watching them sleep. They woke up about 20 minutes later. As B rolled over and saw me laying there he said, “Mama I had to lie with Cam because he had a bad dream. I’m his big brudder and I protect him.”
After getting them up, they ate their cold pancakes and we went outside for the rest of the morning. When I came back in I had 3 missed calls and 4 text messages. But I didn’t care, because I had spent the entire morning outside watching my boys sword fight, play in the pool, and chase the dog.
Life doesn’t get much better than that.